Category Archives: Self Care

Self Care for Couples – Spring Special!

Self Care for Couples - Spring Special!

2-1-18 through 3-31-18

Would you like to create real and lasting closeness with your partner/s? Have you struggled with communication and feeling like your needs are met? Is passive aggression a language you and your partner are speaking?

Spend two hours with Madam C, life and alternative relationship coach,  and learn how to connect with the one you love in a truly deep and meaningful way!

Self Care for Couples includes:

  • One 2-hour session for couples or polyamory pods (up to three people) for just $199! (Save over $100 off the usual session price)
  • Develop a Self Care Plan for your relationship
  • Discover your emotional and physical needs and learn to communicate them openly
  • Mindfulness strategies for enhancing quality time
  • NLP techniques for creating a tighter bond
  • Access to Madam C's resource library
  • 15% off additional session packages!

 

Book Now!

Offer Code: SpringCouple

Offer Restrictions

Session must be requested by midnight EST 3/31/2018. Session must be scheduled and executed by 4/15/2018. Limit one session per couple/pod. Offer restricted to groups of 3 or less with all individuals being 18 years of age or older. 

 

 

Sex & Sensuality Self Care Challenge – Day 8

Touch your body.

On Day 5, I talked about owning your body and encouraged you to do a self-check-in with some questions.  We are going to add to those as this challenge continues!

Today's focus? Touch. Specifically, touching yourself. Yes, like that... but also not like that.

Why is masturbation important for self care?

Masturbation isn't for everyone. It is important to make space for everyone on the sexuality spectrum from asexual and beyond. Masturbation doesn't have to be linked to sex, however. It is merely a series of steps we take to experience a form of physical release... a release of warm, happy chemicals in the body. Adding masturbation to your self care routine can have the following benefits:

  • You become more comfortable with your own body
  • Regular release of dopamine and oxytocin in the body literally lifts your mood
  • These same chemicals can combat stress, pain, and restlessness/sleeplessness
  • Doing sexy things can help you feel sexier. Feeling sexy is really just feeling confident in yourself and in your skin!

But before you masturbate...

It is also important to know your body without the pressure of release or orgasms. This is something that we don't all spend time on daily. When was the last time you listened to your body? When was the last time you massaged your body? When was the last time you truly felt your body for no other purpose than just to feel?

Touching our bodies sensually means to embrace our skin and shapes and softness and roughness and smoothness or hairiness and experience ourselves. Allowing our senses to be filled with different textures and lights and smells and sounds is healthy for our brains!

I challenge you to give these things a shot over the weekend:

  1. Body Scan Meditation - Try a full body scan mediation like this one from The Honest Guys!  There are hundreds of guided full body scans on Youtube, so find the one that works for you. A full body scan lets you listen to the body in a mindful way. You can identify tension, stress, and personal needs by focusing on one body part at a time.
  2. Self Massage - Touch your body with healing intent by engaging in some self-massage! Here are some techniques from Back Authority. 
  3. Delight Your Senses - Do you have a favourite smell? A favourite shirt? A favourite blanket? A favourite song? A favourite taste? Gather all of your favourite sensory experiences and indulge in a session of relaxation and positive vibes.

After you try one or ALL of these ideas, spend some time answering the following questions:

  • What did I expect from my experience?
  • What surprised me about what I felt during this experience?
  • Did I learn anything new about my body or emotions?
  • Is this something I could do on a regular basis for myself?
  • Did this make me feel good?

If you tried any of these strategies before you masturbated...

  • Did I feel like my masturbation session was enhanced by indulging the senses or tuning into my body beforehand?
  • Did any of my sensual experiences transfer into my sexual needs?
  • Do I feel positive about my body and sensual self after this experience?

 

The Goal of The Sex & Sensuality Challenge

By the end of our time together, you will hopefully have a more positive view of your sexual and sensual self and  will have opened your mind to new experiences! This challenge is designed to give you tools to reprogram your brain to embrace your sensuality.

Day 1 - Fake it until you make it.

Day 5 - Own your body.

Day 8 - Touch your body.

 

 

Sex & Sensuality Self Care Challenge – Day 5

 

Own your body.

When I say "own", I mean make it yours. Be familiar with it. Value it. It is your most important possession. Your body is the door through which joy and pleasure enter your life. To own your body is to own your own pleasure.

My body is not perfect. My body feels pain and suffers. My body does not look the way I wish it would look. But my body is a good body, because it is my body. It is the only one I will ever have, regardless of it's composition.

I do the following for own my body every day:

  1.  Self care is not a trend, it is how I live my life. Nourishing and moving and bathing and dressing and resting my body are essential to feeling in touch with who I am and who I want to be! Self care is not "reactive" or "coping". Self care is not an all-day TV binge. Self care is made up of every thing I do to keep my body going and feeling the best it can. My brain is part of my body.
  2. Being responsible for my emotions, actions, and needs. No one can read my mind. All of my emotions are valid whether they are based in rationality or reality or not. My actions, however, should be fueled by my heart and compassion. I have control over how I respond and act. If I need emotional or physical affection, it is my responsibility to ask for these things. Eradicating passive aggression, understanding that partners (be they sexual, romantic, or play) have no responsibility to fulfill me, and embracing consent were all necessary to grant me sexual freedom. I fulfill me, and partners can consent to join me on that journey. Ditching the expectation that someone has to please me was the first step toward pleasing myself.
  3. Loving my flaws and my fierceness. Did I mention my body is not perfect? But my body IS perfect. It is a perfect system of RIGHT NOW. I accept how my body is right now, that I can take steps to change it or improve it if I choose to! I also accept that there are things I may never do, may never experience, may never be. My body is not perfect for all things or all people. That is okay. It doesn't have to be. My body is me, and I am enough!

Own Your Pleasure by Owning Your Body

In a journal, an e-mail to yourself, or mentally... answer these questions as you move forward with the Sex & Sensuality Challenge:

  • How do I care for my body, mind, and spirit every hour of the day?
  • Do I cope or am I proactive?
  • Do I know my sexual and emotional needs?
  • Do I voice my sexual and emotional needs?
  • Am I taking responsibility for my emotions and actions?
  • What does it mean to be fulfilled?
  • What does sensuality mean to me?
  • Am I chasing the future or embracing the now?
  • What do I love about my body and mind?
  • How does my body serve me?
  • Do I accept my body? If yes, why? If no, why not?

Try to keep your answers in a place you can refer back to. Did you have any "I don't know" answers?

The Goal of The Sex & Sensuality Challenge

By the end of our time together, you will hopefully have a more positive view of your sexual and sensual self and  will have opened your mind to new experiences! This challenge is designed to give you tools to reprogram your brain to embrace your sensuality.

 

 

Sex & Sensuality Self Care Challenge – Day 1

Fake It Until You Make It.

Feeling sexy, feeling sensual, loving your body, and loving yourself may not come naturally. Do you experience negative self talk? Do you question whether others will find you attractive? Do you avoid sexual or sensual topics because you struggle with your comfort level in those areas?

Society teaches us that our sexual selves are for someone else... that our appearance and our charm and our likability are related to how marketable we are for partners. But this simply isn't true! If you like who you are and feel confident in yourself, you won't care how other people view your body and mind. Their opinions don't matter!

To jump start the Sex & Sensuality Self Care Challenge, I challenge you to fake it until you make it! Tell yourself your body is sexy! Tell yourself you are charming! Spend some time walking around naked (or in your undies) today and listening to a song that makes you feel like a badass god or goddess! If negative thoughts about your body creep in, immediately list three things you like about yourself!

For example:

"I like my eyes." "I am a good cook." "I am great at research!"

The Goal of The Sex & Sensuality Challenge

By the end of our time together, you will hopefully have a more positive view of your sexual and sensual self and  will have opened your mind to new experiences! This challenge is designed to give you tools to reprogram your brain to embrace your sensuality.

 

 

Self Care Sessions

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Have You Taken Time for Yourself Lately?

Men and women handle daily stress differently. Women need a trusted confidant. Men need an escape. Both can be defined as "me time". None of us are taking enough time for ourselves. But we should be! It's an important part of self care!

What Is Self Care?

Everything that you do to stay alive, and out of a doctor or therapist's office is technically self care. Self care can encompass broad strategies such as stress management and living mindfully. Self care can also address issues with self-esteem and worth.

When we are not sated by sleep, food, water, and human contact, we become less than ourselves.

Why Do I Have to Learn Self Care?

One word- DISCIPLINE.

Self care isn't always easy. Self care requires you to make conscious decisions to put yourself first and requires every day practice to become part of your life. This becomes complicated within interpersonal and professional relationships where we are tasked with caring for others. You are not, however, allowed to give up the responsibility you have to take care of yourself... and you cannot serve from an empty vessel.

Being over-worked, subsisting on a poor diet, and leading a life that lacks joy can detract from existing authentically. I can work with you to find or make the time you need for yourself.  I offer Self Care Sessions that focus on meeting your emotional need to recharge.

For couples, small groups, & individuals, this session includes:

  • Self Care education
  • Finding your Self Care "Blind Spots"
  • Developing a Self Care Plan
  • Take-home strategies for creating a Self Care Lifestyle
  • Guided practice of relaxation and visualization skills
  • Online or In-Person Sessions
  • Learning how Self Care fits into your life and schedule with proven techniques for calming the mind
  • The option of a 60 or 90 minute session, or package plans
  • Sliding scale available

 

REGISTER FOR SELF CARE SESSIONS