When I say "own", I mean make it yours. Be familiar with it. Value it. It is your most important possession. Your body is the door through which joy and pleasure enter your life. To own your body is to own your own pleasure.
My body is not perfect. My body feels pain and suffers. My body does not look the way I wish it would look. But my body is a good body, because it is my body. It is the only one I will ever have, regardless of it's composition.
I do the following for own my body every day:
- Self care is not a trend, it is how I live my life. Nourishing and moving and bathing and dressing and resting my body are essential to feeling in touch with who I am and who I want to be! Self care is not "reactive" or "coping". Self care is not an all-day TV binge. Self care is made up of every thing I do to keep my body going and feeling the best it can. My brain is part of my body.
- Being responsible for my emotions, actions, and needs. No one can read my mind. All of my emotions are valid whether they are based in rationality or reality or not. My actions, however, should be fueled by my heart and compassion. I have control over how I respond and act. If I need emotional or physical affection, it is my responsibility to ask for these things. Eradicating passive aggression, understanding that partners (be they sexual, romantic, or play) have no responsibility to fulfill me, and embracing consent were all necessary to grant me sexual freedom. I fulfill me, and partners can consent to join me on that journey. Ditching the expectation that someone has to please me was the first step toward pleasing myself.
- Loving my flaws and my fierceness. Did I mention my body is not perfect? But my body IS perfect. It is a perfect system of RIGHT NOW. I accept how my body is right now, that I can take steps to change it or improve it if I choose to! I also accept that there are things I may never do, may never experience, may never be. My body is not perfect for all things or all people. That is okay. It doesn't have to be. My body is me, and I am enough!
Own Your Pleasure by Owning Your Body
In a journal, an e-mail to yourself, or mentally... answer these questions as you move forward with the Sex & Sensuality Challenge:
- How do I care for my body, mind, and spirit every hour of the day?
- Do I cope or am I proactive?
- Do I know my sexual and emotional needs?
- Do I voice my sexual and emotional needs?
- Am I taking responsibility for my emotions and actions?
- What does it mean to be fulfilled?
- What does sensuality mean to me?
- Am I chasing the future or embracing the now?
- What do I love about my body and mind?
- How does my body serve me?
- Do I accept my body? If yes, why? If no, why not?
Try to keep your answers in a place you can refer back to. Did you have any "I don't know" answers?
The Goal of The Sex & Sensuality Challenge
By the end of our time together, you will hopefully have a more positive view of your sexual and sensual self and will have opened your mind to new experiences! This challenge is designed to give you tools to reprogram your brain to embrace your sensuality.